Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #250517 in Books
• Published on: 1998-01-03
• Binding: Paperback
• 224 pages

Synopsis
Graham was an historian: he was meant to be an expert on the past. But there were aspects of it, he discovered, that couldn't be subdued, that simply carried on, lively and painful, as if they were the present. He began to mind. He minded very much indeed. While those around him look on - with concern, with contempt, with amusement - Graham's meticulous passion gradually begins to run out of control. Julian Barnes presents an unnerving version of sexual jealousy and shows it to be not just living, but reasonable, ordinary, funny, dangerous and consuming.

Customer Reviews

An eerie work of jealously and sexual rivalry
There's no denying that Julian Barnes's Before She Met Me is an absorbing, even compelling, account of one man's descent from jealousy into obsession and ultimately to insanity. Graham, happily and then unsatisfying married, falls for Ann, for whom he leaves his wife and daughter. With Ann, a sometime bit part actress seems to offer him the solace and companionship which Graham has just discovered that he's been lacking all these years. By then, through the offices of his bitter ex-wife, he happens to see a film featuring, albeit briefly, Ann. He becomes obsessed with her past, convulsively gathering evidence of her former liaisons and boyfriends and even passing acquaintances. But he can't leave it there: and what he imagines his wife did before she met him becomes worse that what she actually did. Sad, funny and disturbing, Barnes' prose is as always, well-measured and quite elegant. Yet there is something just a little unsatisfying about this novel. Never quite convinced that Graham's descent is totally self-driven, the reader is left wondering about the machinations of his friends and his ex-wife particularly: the questions surrounding their role are never quite resolved and yet too closely drawn to remain provocatively ambiguous. Barnes has done a lot better.

No One Escapes
I am well into a sixth book by Mr. Julian Barnes, so while I may have completed his entire body of work, I do think I can say this is not only a dark exception to his writing, but contains topics that are deviant. Individual conduct may be more appropriate than topic, as the most bazaar behavior is reserved for one player. Others in this book are eccentric bordering on the repugnant, but no literary rules state we must like who we read about.

For example, if a writer/amateur psychologist, who revels in his flatulence, can be endured, you will get through the book. There is no gray area with this particular character, no compromise, be amused, or be repelled, those are the options. There are many other minor players that all are people you would not miss meeting, however the main character will test your thresholds for the bizarre.

A man marries for the second time. He brings to this union his own history of relationships with women from earliest unfulfilled fantasies, to complete biblical knowledge of his female counterparts. Like her husband, the wife too brings her own life experiences both real, and fictional, as her career as a "minor actress" occasioned the illusion of intimacy on the screen of silver.

As his curiosity of seeing an old film, becomes an obsession of repeated viewings, and videotaped collecting, the husband departs reality, pauses for bizarre ritual, and finally plummets with finality.

The effort here is tolerating the sideshow freakish behavior that is repellent. If the reader can do so, the reward of this writer's skill is the only satisfaction you will have. This is certainly not a book I would recommend as an introduction to this man's work. If this were the first of his I came upon, it surely would have been the last. However, once read in the context of his body of work, while divergent, annoying, and filled with players who may only gain your contempt, the effort is worth it.

Enjoyable but lacking substance
This is the first Barnes book I have read. Although I have glanced at many others on the shelves of my girlfriends flat--she is a new and confirmed fan. Before She met me, she(my girlfriend) claimed was one of the best.
So I dove in with great enthusiasm and at first was totally absorbed. I found the portrayal of "Graham" and the background circumstances of his life before the real story starts fascinating, down to earth and totally believable. This, for me made it all the more absorbing-- here was a real guy, in real situations, with real perceptions, insecurities etc. Barnes' writing made the opening chapters startlingly real and had me eagerly awaiting the main story.

And so into the main body of the story--Grahams inability to deal with his second wives past. A great premise, which I am sure many people, have at sometime had concerns about, although hopefully not to the extent of Graham. However for me this is where some of the story started to loose my initial absolute fascination. The characters obsessions started to seem far-fetched. No longer did the story feel glaringly real but started to emit an air of fantasy--notably Grahams imaginary conversations with B movie stars on the screen. His wives incredible understanding of her husbands' paranoia, whilst admirable also felt too good to be true and this character I felt could have had a little more depth.

Then there is the juxtaposition of Grahams friend "Jack" the romance writer and his wife Sue who seem to openly cheat on each other with few cares in the world. But again, whilst Jack is a great character who continually made me laugh, little seems to be made of this obvious contradiction in mentality between the two couples-Sue has hardly any scenes at all, why is Graham so crippled by jealousy for past
deeds but Sue happily lets Jack cheat all the time?

The book having me fairly absorbed all the way through seemed to end in a gripping, startling, tales of the unexpected type fashion, but again had me asking am I now reading a thriller?

I would have found Before she met me a more satisfying read if Barnes had stuck to the initial style of the book and gone on to present us with a realistic tale of a mans obsessions. For me the obsessions went to far and changed the tone of the book, too many genres seemed to be encapsulated.

Though still enjoyable I was left disappointed that this story was not as involving or profound as in the start it seemed like it could be.

I would not go out of my way to recommend this. But don't tell my girlfriend that!!