Product Description

Within a few years of packing her bags for London as a starry-eyed 15-year-old, Debbie Barham became one of the wittiest and most prolific writers in Britain, working for comedy names such as Rory Bremner and Clive Anderson. But things soon went wrong for Debbie: her comic genius belied a darker, destructive side that slowly span out of control. In this poignant memoir of his daughter's short life, Peter Barham sets out to discover the powerful force that drove Debbie to anorexia, whilst inspiring her to write some of the best lines in British comedy. Drawing on her copious e-mails and scripts, and featuring contributions from some of the UK's most famous comedians, including Rory Bremner, Clive Anderson, Ned Sherrin and Bob Monkhouse, Peter takes you from the heady excitement of Debbie's mid-teen years to her troubled, solitary end. "The Invisible Girl" is a father's remarkable journey to discover what went wrong in the mysterious and very private world of his daughter. It is a powerful and moving story that will make you laugh and cry in equal measure.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #311018 in Books
• Published on: 2006-08-07
• Original language: English
• Binding: Paperback
• 416 pages

Review
'Debbie Barham was addicted to comedy: she lived and died writing it. This book is a moving tribute to an astonishing talent and a life that ran out before the jokes did.' Rory Bremner 'A truly extraordinary person.' Clive Anderson 'The unsung queen of comedy.' The Telegraph 'She could be rude enough to make even Graham Norton blush.' Ned Sherrin 'An amazing talent.' Bob Monkhouse 'In her short life, Deb achieved what most writers would wish for in a much longer lifetime. She was prodigiously talented.' Bruce Hyman radio producer 'A frank and heartbreaking account of the battle with anorexia that left acclaimed comedy writer Deborah Barham dead at 26.' Mail on Sunday (Jan 06) 'Her speed was astonishing. There is a phrase in comedy, "Do you want it funny or do you want it fast?" But invariably you got both with Debbie.' RORY BREMNER 'She produced a phenomenal amount of material -- on any given occasion several times the quantity of any other writer I have ever had anything to do with. A truly extraordinary person.' CLIVE ANDERSON

About the Author
PETER BARHAM was an absentee father -- he didn't know his daughter well until she turned up on his doorstep weighing little over five stone. For nine months Peter gave Debbie round-the-clock care but her desire for independence finally took her back to London and the life that destroyed her three years later. ALAN HURNDALL is an eminent award-winning journalist, writer, author and film-maker.

Customer Reviews

Depressing and dangerous
I wholeheartedly agree with everything volunteered by the first reviewer, and feel I must reiterate that a) Mr. Barham had no place to be writing this book, and b) what he has composed is in no way helpful or appropriate to anyone dealing with anorexia. It is completely indefensible that Debbie was allowed to indulge her illness so totally, to the exclusion of any other real relationships, and eventually to her own final destruction. Mr. Barham obviously has no understanding of anorexia whatsoever, and almost seems to sentimentalise it - somehow feeling, as indeed he states that 'genius and madness go hand in hand', like somehow his daughter's 'genius' was underlined and reinforced by these 'demons' tearing her apart. First of all, I'm afraid to say that - wishing her no disrespect - I cannot seriously consider Debbie to be a 'genius'. She was a good and talented and sharp writer, but genius? I think not. And anorexia is not in any way a beautiful tragic illness that aflicts only the creative and the gifted. It is a destructive, neurotic mental illness, and those caught in it's grips have virtually no useful insight into it. Of course Debbie didn't want to get any treatment, that is a qualifier of the condition! Anyone who inadvertantly became very underweight and wanted help to put the weight back on would by definition NOT be anorexic. The point is that Debbie starved herself down to a dangerous weight of her own volition, and was terrified of the notion of putting it back on. The fact that her 'insights' into her condition, and her opinions on it, were treated with such ostensible gravitas and respect, is absolutley ludicrous. If someone is disturbed and disordered enough to starve their own body, the vehicle of their life, down to a weight where fatality is imminent, how can they possibly be credited with having any valid opinions on either that body, or that life? Debbie was in the grips of a serious disease, and the fact that she was a good writer was completley irrelevant - I, like the first reviewer, am utterly horrified that she wasn't sectioned, and was instead allowed to destroy herself in this way.

Of course she would have been furious, and devastated, and far more besides, had she been put in hospital against her will. Of course she would have flown into a rage against her father and mother and whoever else 'conspired' to get her there. And it would have taken many years to resolve these feelings - but resolvable they were, because anoreixa, in the right environments, is completley treatable. She was a young girl battling with the scars of her childhood, not some tormented genius with inexplicable and visionary demons, which is what her father seems to believe. He himself makes it perfectly clear why her anorexia might have started - he comments on her weight as a teenager as 'cheery', 'full-figured', etcetra, in rather patronising way and then admits himself, when her anorexia had begun, she became 'wonderfully slim'. These attitudes are very common, and to the fragile adolescent psyche of a bright young girl, they can be completely destructive, unbearable, and, in this case, fatal. This book is not in any way about the tragic demise of a brilliant writer - it is a very sad and rather sordid tale of a damaged and confused young girl who was let down by her parents, misunderstood and unsupported by those around her, and allowed to pay the ultimate price for everyone else's stupidity.

Disapointing book...
The subject matter is obviously highly sensitive and my review may upset those close to Debs, but I feel I need to be honest in my opinion of the book. I am not blaming anyone but do question the book as a whole...

Barham focuses entirely on the genius daughter (as if the price of being a genius is the pain that she went through). This theme is totally in-your-face throughout and he breaks the ONE essential rule of writing, 'don't tell, show'. This means that it is not an easy read and things are just thrown at the reader without us gently being led to our own conclusions.

As soon as I read that Barham had only lived with Debs for 9 months of her 26 years I lost total confidence in the narrator. This information keeps forcing you to question how he can write a book about something as complex as anorexia and a daughter he hardly spoke to for most of her life.

There is an 'essay' at the end of the book that Debbie had published in a book under a different name. Barham believes that this was about her mother. I think it is terribly wrong and insensitive of Barham to publish it here. He said that he was sure Debs wanted her mother to realise it was based on her because of the factual information that, apparently, proved she wanted her mother to recognise herself, (what makes Barham think the mother would even know to buy the book in the first place? And, as he had already said, he bought the book and hadn't even realised Debs had written it until after her death when he found the royalty cheque. So why would her mother recognise it?). As a writer myself, I can identify with what Debs was doing. Facts and fiction go hand in hand. It doesn't mean the finished piece is fact and it doesn't mean the feelings of the persona are her own feelings.
But the real point is, Debs changed her name for this piece and I seriously feel her father should have respected her wishes and not published it here. It reads as if he was spitefully 'proving' it was someone else's fault and not his (another common theme throughout the book which makes for uncomfortable reading).

I believe, as with any person with anorexia, there was a tiny bit of Debs that wanted some help and treatment. The only time that there is no hope is when a person is dead, until then there is something to work with, no matter how small that part is. It is crazy to realise she lived for more than 2 years between 4 and 5 and a half stone. How could they not have sectioned her? I realise Debbie said that treatment would take away her writing during time as an IP but as Barham admitted himself, it was her writing that was reinforcing her anorexic state (she was living off her writing). She needed time in hospital to break away from her writing for work, to break away from the routine she'd created which was destroying her, and she should have had a chance to heal. She was never given that chance. I feel the need to clarify here that I am not attacking Barham for not forcing IP treatment on Debs because, for whatever reasons, everyone does their best at the time and in hindsight we may have done something differently.

However, Barham has remarkably little insight into anorexia. There was no depth or understanding into the anorexic world. There are comments throughout which also confirm his insensitive approach:
There is one part when he went to an IP place and was shocked to see some of the IPs. But at this point he says he remembered Debs was far worse than these people. To be honest I find that very difficult to believe becuase we're talking about an NHS IP hospital and the only patients they take in are near death.

But, with the above example in mind, Barham's constant referring
to health in terms of weight is what clearly shows he has no idea about the disease and what happens in the mind. He obviously views EDs as non-critical if a person is a higher weight. This only feeds the anorexic mind.
These are common mistakes that people make when they first have to deal with someone who is anorexic. But Barham had lived for 9 months with Debs and then decided to write a book about the whole of her life. I do think there should have been much more depth, or an attempt to understand her disease.

I guess, more than anything, the book made me angry. It lacked real insight which would be vital if Barham wants to help other families, as he says he does.
Barham appears to want to blame someone and give reasons for her illness (sometimes there are no reasons); and lastly I really do feel Debbie wasn't given the chance to find her true self.
The reasons given for not sectioning Debs do seem rather wet. Of course she would have been angry if people went behind her back (just like any other anorexic would be), and of course she would feel destroyed if she were sectioned but these are feelings that she could have worked through with the experts in an eating disorder uinit. It may not have worked at all, but at least there would have been a chance.

And the final absurdity is when Barham says he does not want Debs to be remembered as an anorexic. So why has he written the book then?

This is a very sad story about a girl who simply could not survive in the world without proper help.
But because of the attacks on others and the lack of insight you can't help thinking there's going to be another book on the way:
Debbie Barham: The Real Story by Barham's ex.

Lets play the blame game!
Whilst I found this a book difficult to put down, it left somewhat of a bitter after taste. Peter Barham most certainly does not possess any were near the genius and talent for writing as his daughter! He certainly relies a great deal on her writings through out, which in my opinion is the one redeeming quality for this book.
What does concern me greatly is an implication of blame for his daughter's demise; directed solely towards Debbie's mother Ann. Does he feel the need to credit her with this to ease his own feeling of guilt! She clearly had no deep bonding to either of her parents and other than an essay (Debbie, being the only one for sure knowing if it was fiction or fact), disclosed her demons to none! Is it fair to make accusations when the only person who has the right to point the finger is no longer here? Does he give Ann the opportunity to air her side, sadly no.
This is a tragic story of a brilliant young mind, struggling with whatever demons powered her, whom in life valued above all else her privacy. Alas, her father has appeared to use her story as a form of playing the blame game in an attempt to deeply wound his estranged ex-wife, rather than rejoice in the brilliance of a life they both played a part in creating!