Product Description

Communication is one of the biggest challenges faced by people with Asperger's Syndrome (AS), yet an Asperger marriage requires communication more than any other relationship. Thousands of people live in Asperger marriages without knowing the answers to important questions such as 'What behaviours indicate that my spouse has AS?' 'Is it worthwhile to get a diagnosis?' 'Is there hope for improvement?' Katrin Bentley has been married for 18 years. Since receiving her husband's diagnosis of AS, their marriage has improved substantially. They learnt to accept each other's different approaches to life and found ways to overcome problems and misunderstandings. Today, they are happily married and able to communicate effectively. "Alone Together" shares the struggle of one couple to rescue their marriage. It is uplifting and humorous, and includes plenty of tips to making an Asperger marriage succeed. This book offers couples hope, encouragement and strategies for their own marriages.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #49469 in Books
• Published on: 2007-05-15
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 128 pages

About the Author
Katrin Bentley was born in Switzerland but now lives in Queensland, Australia, with her husband, Gavin, who has Asperger's Syndrome. Katrin volunteers at Asperger Services Australia. She is also a qualified primary school teacher and fitness instructor.

Customer Reviews

Alone Together:Making an Asperger Marriage Work
This book has probably saved my marriage overnight. I have AS but didn't realise how my words and actions were affecting my wife. She couldn't understand why I treated her so badly but acted as if everything was OK. This book has given my wife the answers. She realises that my actions and words were not aimed at her and that I did really love her. I am now aware how I affect those around me. The book has allowed the two of us to realise that we can live together each armed with an understanding of the others perspective. If you or your partner have AS you must read this.

Best and most helpful book for an Asperger Marriage
The book, only published just over a year ago, is extremely helpful as it shows my wife that my behaviour isn't just me, it's Asperger's behaviour. There are so many instances mentioned in the book that have happened between my wife and I. We were able to look back at these instances and for the first time have a good laugh about them.

The book accurately portrays in a light hearted and serious way what it is like to be married to an Asperger from both partners points of view. At all times, Katrin Bentley the author treats her husband and his Aspergers with respect unlike most books on the subject which often show a total and naive lack of understanding of Asperger's Syndrome treating us as second class citizens that need to be treated in order to become more Neuro Typical.

Where Katrin the author really succeeds that to have a successful relationship with an Asperger Husband the Neuro Typical wife needs to understand and accept their differences.

Women who often have failed relationships with Asperger men almost always blame it on their incompatibility rather than there failure to understand and accept the fact that we are only normal but different. Women in failed Asperger relationships fail to accept our differences it is as simple as that.

Both my wife and I have learnt a great deal from the book and has been a great help in getting our marriage/relationship back on track.

In my opinion is worth every penny.

For a reference book on Asperger's Syndrome for adults as well, I recommend "Asperger's Answer Book (Top 300 Hundred Question Parents Ask)I would change the word parents to anyone living with an Asperger. This book is written more like a reference book which is to be looked at and refered back to time and time again and is excellent in what it pertains to do. It explains every thing one needs to know about Asperger's Syndrome in an easy to understand way.

Mutual Understanding Removes Your Stressful Life!
As Katrin Bentry shows, it is quite hard and challenging for neurotypical(NT) people to deal with Aspies. Gavin, Katrin's husband with Asperger syndrome(AS) is a typical example, I'd say. He was such a perfectionist that the whole family had to treat him with kids' gloves. He likes sports such as tennis and swimming and is very enthusiastic to them. But the problem was that didn't always satisfy his family because of his pedantic and perfectionist approach to life. He got easily ornery when things didn't go all right and their kids couldn't play sports as he had expected. I must say he acted as if he had condescended to them even if he didn't mean to. Nothing was so stressful as this! It not only exhausted him but his family!

But why did Katrin decide not to divorce him? I think it's mainly because she realized she herself had several AS traits although she is an NT person. And this motivated her to know more about Gavin's specific AS traits. And her dedication to Gavin could appeal to him. So, understanding each other is the first step to better communication. To me, Gavin has been mellower since his diagnosis with AS.