Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #112919 in Books
• Published on: 2004-02
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 208 pages

Synopsis
Bipolar disorder is characterized by alternating periods of dramatically manic behaviour and episodes of extreme sadness and hopelessness, often with periods of normalcy in between. Those close to sufferers may experience feelings of constant uncertainty about the bipolar individual's mood. Specifically for the partner of a bipolar individual, learn how to control episodic crises and create a loving, healthy and supportive relationship. Find out what type of coping approaches work and which do not. Know when to call for help. All of the tactics in this book offer relief, engender a greater sense of stability and reassures the partner that this is absolutely achievable with patience and good advice.

Customer Reviews

More for sufferers than partners
This would be a great book to buy if you and your partner are looking for something you can work through together - if they'd like to learn some self-help techniques for living with bipolar disorder, and you'd like to learn how your own actions impact on that. If Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder had been written for couples (with a different title, obviously) I think I would recommend it.

Unfortunately, if you're a partner reading this on your own, there's one thing you need to know. This book is not about coping with your loved one's illness. It's about creating a holistic "treatment" (self-help) programme for them, and for me that's where the alarm bells start ringing. If there's one thing I've learned in the six years I've been with my partner, it's that I can't make her decisions for her. Yes, I can share my ideas about what's likely to help. Yes, there may be times I need to step in and take control, if she's severely ill and a danger to herself. But I can waste a lot of time and energy figuring out what's "best" for her, then getting frustrated if she doesn't do it, when actually it's her life and her right to choose. I've found it far more helpful to focus on finding ways of coping, and on figuring out when it is and isn't appropriate for me to take over.

Julie Fast's self-help programme for bipolar disorder does look excellent. It's all about getting to know yourself and your illness - symptoms, triggers, early warning signs, what helps and what doesn't. I can imagine someone with bipolar disorder getting a lot out of it (if they're self-help oriented). The trouble with this book is it places the onus on the partner rather than the sufferer. Fast actually encourages you to make lists of all your partner's symptoms, what you believe triggers them and what works or doesn't work - and she says if your partner is not willing to make changes, you can implement the programme yourself. I found this a little creepy. It's not that I'm against understanding how my own actions affect my partner and her symptoms - that's very useful information to have. What worries me is the extent Fast expects partners to go to. If the person with bipolar disorder is not trying to identify and avoid triggers, identify and respond to warning signs and so on, then it's a futile battle for the partner to try to control the illness only through their own behaviour. I know this because I have tried - it didn't help my partner and only made me more stressed out.

I suspect what's happened is that Fast, who has bipolar disorder herself, has written a self-help book for those with the illness (Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder). She has then taken the same techniques and repackaged them for partners, with little understanding of the non-bipolar partner's needs or what's appropriate to their role. I did find the first chapter excellent for understanding the impact the illness has on me and setting some goals, but there was nothing in the rest of the book that would help me reach those goals. Six years of loving someone with bipolar disorder have taught me that I cannot control her, her symptoms or her treatment; I can only step in and help when appropriate.

If you and your partner are genuinely looking for a self-help programme you can do together, then I would buy this book. But if you're looking for ways to cope with your partner's illness, I would save yourself some money and join a good support group instead.

Excellent Resource for BPD Individuals and their partners
This book is genuinely helpful and insightful. The authors have a lot of insight into what it is to be bipolar and cope with relationships. The exercises are direct, clear and simple. This book can make a difference :)

Too many typos, too hard to read and not very encouraging
Sorry, but I found this book a real bind. Having picked it up all enthusiastic, wanting to be the best husband I could be for my wife who has bipolar disorder, it brought me crashing down to earth with a bump.
I found the writing style very difficult to read, and I don't know who proof-read it, but it's riddled with typos. There must be 20 or more random words that just appear in the middle of sentences that don't make any sense.
Although I am sure there are some very helpful tips contained within this book, I'm afraid that after a while, I found myself reading paragraphs too many times just trying to take in what they were saying.
Personally, I need a much thinner book with more of an emphasis on helping the person with bipolar disorder, and living your life at the same time. This book seems to get too bogged down in areas that are just not helpful to people in my situation.