Product Description

''Cometh the hour, cometh the novelist. It would be hard to imagine a book that scored a more penetrating bull's-eye on the target of the moment. In the run-down urban badlands of West Cumbria, Eric not only doles out survival tips about the ''fascinating worm-holes'' of the banking and benefits system to the chronically indebted. He practises what he preaches with a maze of scams designed to keep him ahead of collectors and courts. This house of maxed-out cards crashes down, but not before Eric's wheezes have lit up the thrilling ''danger'' and ''chance'' of big borrowing.'' - Boyd Tonkin, Independent

''Gaffney's strength is creating strong characters, and this debut brims with them. With a ruthless eye and pitch-black humour, Gaffney explores a consumer culture in which exploiting the welfare system is both a necessity and an addiction, and in which hypocrisy is endemic. This clever novel couldn t be more timely it forces us to confront society's incredible thirst for credit, and our own sense of entitlement'' - The Observer

Gaffney's uneasily jocular, brilliantly observed caper descends into full-on grisly nightmare - The Guardian

''Addresses the current issue of bad credit: an amusing black comedy in how not to manage finances or relationships'' - Financial Times

LONGLISTED FOR THE DESMOND ELLIOTT PRIZE 2009

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #115712 in Books
• Published on: 2008-09-25
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 302 pages

Ian McMillan
'In Never Never David Gaffney's shows that the surefootedness and invention he brings to his short stories can be transferred to the longer form: all the Gaffney trademarks are here, the sparky prose, the deft building of situations, the glee in wrong footing the reader. Epic suits him as much as anecdote!'

Guardian
'Reality becomes strange and distorted; words and phrases acquire a compelling importance'

Review
`This clever novel couldn't be more timely ... Forces us to confront society's incredible thirst for credit'

Customer Reviews

someone always needs you
I read Never Never in one sitting and found it a brilliantly dark and hilarious expose of the world of debts, welfare benefits, bankruptcy and publicly-funded advice work. Gaffney's snappy well constructed chapters kept me guessing all the way through. The book gives you a view from every point in the world of the indebted, revealed to be a perverse matrix of owers, owed-to, and parasitic inbetweeners. There's Doreen who's in it up to her neck, there's Mr Friday the struggling door to door loan collector, there the menacing council estate illegal lender, there's Eric the debt counsellor who owes more money than most of his clients, and there's Eric's amiable local bank manager, and loads more. It's a deftly written, scarily real and frightening novel, a black comedy with serious undertones, a story to remind us that people who owe money are not all incompetent, feckless over-spenders - there's a deeper reason for debt; we all need in some way to belong, and debt can help us do that. When you're in debt, someone always needs you - even if it's just the call centre at the bank's legal section. Never Never comes highly recommended whether you have debts or not. (but especially if you do because there's a few helpful tips in there to aid the old bank balance)

A Disturbing Reflection
A man lies half-dead tied to a radiator. Standing over him is Apartfromtheobvious and Magnum. This amateur couple are clueless about how to finish the job in the cleanest way.

Meanwhile, Eric has bills to pay and no means to do so. He helps people manage their debts for a living; unfortunately, this is something he can't apply to his own life. To make matters worse Eric has started receiving cryptic postcards of caravans with one word on the back of each. Coerce. Calculated. Humiliation. These puzzles mean nothing to Eric, and things get stranger when he is harassed by a mute, life size, walking lemon.

With loan sharks to pay, a demanding girlfriend, an unhinged ex and his new boss suspecting him of fraud Eric's life is spiralling out of control and it seems he is only capable of making matters worse.

With his tricks of the trade running out what will happen to Eric when he has no trump left to play and his debts finally catch up with him?


This is a fantastic novel that couldn't be more relevant and of its time. A disturbing portrayal of the modern day attitude towards debt and symptoms that come with it. Gaffney's writing style is superb, mixing comedy with brutality, gluing the reader to the page. Another brilliant novel from independent publishers Tindal Street Press.

If you're thinking of getting another loan or credit card, read this book, then think again.

Merciless and Hilarious
Many will have read David Gaffney's snappy short stories over the years and wondered: When will this boy write a novel? Well, here it is, and fans of the author's quirky humour won't be disappointed. It tells the story of the new religion, money, and how one consumer is consumed by its hollow promise. Seldom has a book been more relevant to our times: as global markets collapse and hapless spendthrifts are devoured by the jaws of their own greed, Never Never delineates the cultural moment with merciless lucidity. Like me you've probably spent the last few years wondering where people's money was coming from. Gaffney's novel has the answer that should have been obvious: nowhere.