Product Description

Troubled Environmental Health Officer Danny Skinner is engaged on a quest to uncover what he refers to as 'the bedroom secrets of the master chefs'. He regards the unravelling of this classified information as the key to learning genetic facts about himself and the crippling compulsions that threaten to wreck his young life. The ensuing journey takes him from Europe's festival city of Edinburgh to the foodie capital of America, San Francisco. But the hard-drinking, womanising Skinner has a strange nemesis in the form of model-railway enthusiast Brian Kibby. It is his unfathomable, obsessive hatred of Kibby that takes over everything, threatening to destroy not only Skinner and his mission but also those he loves most dearly. When Kibby contracts a horrific and debilitating mystery virus, Skinner understands that his destiny is inextricably bound to that of his hated rival, and he is faced with a terrible dilemma. "The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs" is a gothic parable about the great obsessions of our time: food, sex and minor celebrity, and is a brilliant examination of identity, male rivalry and the need to belong in the world.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #25618 in Books
• Published on: 2007-08-02
• Original language: English
• Binding: Paperback
• 448 pages

Review
The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs is Welsh back on cracking, page-turning, stomach-churning, gut-busting form. You'll whiz through it, in a good way Independent Irvine Welsh is in a class of his own...[his books have] a seething life in them that rivets attention and an inventiveness with story and language that continually amuses and amazes...The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs...shares the same roiling chorus of hard men, wee hoors, old jakeys and biddies as its predecessors, builds with the same logic of escalating perversity, and leaves one with the same reeling sensation of having got quite a bit more than one's money's worth Guardian In the outrageous and exhilarating foul-mouthed book, Welsh once again uses the demonic to create serious comedy Sunday Times The great liberation of Welsh's writing is it's ability to capture the lust for freedom...the most touching and beautiful of his writings...if her carries on like this he'll start dragging the place [Scotland] back to the bloody enlightenment Independent This transitional phase in his life is has been mirrored by a new direction in Welsh's writing as evinced by this new book, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs. The novel is less visceral than his past work and is more in dialogue with Celtic writers such a Oscar Wilde than it is music, the form he has long claimed his inspiration GQ This is Welsh's tightest narrative structure in some time, and a pleasing change of pace after his previous two novels...a carefully considered blend of three-dimensional realism and expertly judged modern gothic horror. Welsh is such a convincing writer that you never doubt his plot for a moment Literary Review Run along, buy the book, it's very good indeed, better even than Trainspotting, so therefore Welsh's best. It is an exquisitely paced black comedy. There was a rumour that Welsh's last novel, Porno was to be his last. Well if this, instead, is his last he's certainly gone out with a bang. But I hope it isn't Evening Standard Flickers with the dynamism, black humour and imaginative bravado that is Welsh at his best Financial Times

Observer
`Executed with energy and inventiveness'.

Sunday Herald
'Welsh scores with his updates version of The Picture of Dorian Grey.'

Customer Reviews

The further decline of Irvine Welsh
This is another novel by Irvine Welsh following pretty much the same trajectory as his others. Like "Marabou Stork Nightmares", "Filth", and "Porno", it's a story of a man working towards a breakdown. There are lots of drugs taken; this time it's mostly alcohol, and there's some welcome reflections on the destructive slow descent from social drinker to alcoholic. There's good use of mulitple perspectives to show each of the main character's thought processes, though not for any other real reason. There's some graphically-described sex, and one truly revolting scene (as always). Relationships and the banal malevolence of office politics are acutely described - Welsh has a razor-sharp eye if nothing else.

The conceit of the novel is that, after Dorian Grey, a man suffers the consequences of another's substance abuse. Quite what this is meant to suggest I don't know. Apart from some musing on the symbiotic nature of enemies and nemesis', it's not really an allegory or a metaphor for anything, it's just a conceit to allow some highly vivid descriptions of physical decay.

The thing is, it's not only following a law of diminishing returns (so that these retreads on familiar material get progressively worse, "Porno" excepted because of his all-too-evident fondness of the old characters). To progress with your art you have to struggle. There's no struggle here, no development. It's slightly more "literary" in that there are more allusions and quotations, but far less literary than "Trainspotting" because there's no depth to the novel. It's in present-tense, this-this-this style which allows no reflection and no real substance.

Welsh really must get out of his comfort zone. If he would write about street culture as its happening now, or about the corruptions of power without resorting to bodily metaphors, or about the class war from the post-modern perpective, I'd be interested. But he's not pushing himself, and it's getting boring.

A quality read!

A quality read!

What really did this for me is the writing, the language was incredible. The use of strong words that flowed together like a dream, and at the same time keeping Welsh's prominent style of laugh out loud, alcoholism, and the usual debauchery.

The story line is interesting and also quite meaningful, the comparison between the two characters Danny Skinner and Brian Kibby was masterfully created into two extreme personalities that Welsh had described with complete preciseness. Kibby is a totally nerd, goes to Star trek conventions, loves model railways and plays the lamest computer game on earth...Harvest Moon. Yet we get drawn extremely deep into his life, and at times i was hating him, feeling sorry for him and other times actually liking him.

In my opinion this is one of Welsh's best books, definitely worth a read!

Hit & Miss
Just finished reading this book in a rare 1 day stint. Having read all his previous books, some brilliant (Trainspotting, Glue, Porno), some average (Ecstacy) and some downright weird (Marabou Stork nightmares)I found this to be a muddle of a book containing elements of all the above.
Yes it was entertaining enough to keep me reading in almost one session, and there are some parts which are classic Welsh, but in saying that the author seems to have bursts of creative energy followed by sections which seem to contain a distinct lack of interest or inspiration. There are many interesting threads which if they had continued would have made great reading, however most of these seems to get forgotten or die a quick death. There are also sections which dont seem to add any value to the overall novel themes. The relationship between Kay and De Freitas and what becomes of it being a typical example. Another would be the Ian / Brian / Star Trek thread.
The book is highly cliched in parts and I guessed the "shock revelation" about half way through the book.
Definately not up to scratch with the classics, full of promise that never quite materialises and disappointing in the end.