Product Description

From Love's Executioner to The Gift of Therapy, over the past quarter century Irvin Yalom has established himself as the world's leading group psychotherapist. In this new work, Staring at the Sun, Dr. Yalom opens the 'mortal wound', our knowledge of death. Carried by each and every human being, death anxiety is the price for our self-awareness and the shadow from which we cannot be separated. Because we cannot live frozen in fear, we turn to our children, to wealth, to fame, or to a belief in a higher power to soften death's terror. But in spite of the staunchest, most venerable of our defences, death anxiety is never completely subdued: it is always there, lurking in the hidden ravines of our minds. At age 70 and facing his own fear of death, which he will discuss in a special after-word - Dr. Yalom tackles his toughest subject yet, and finds it to be the root cause of patients' fears, stressors and depression. If therapists are to do their best to deliver 'the gift of therapy', they must confront the realities of life for themselves and their practice, as must we all. This book is a book of wisdom for us all about how to cope with our 'ultimate concerns'.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #11115 in Books
• Published on: 2008-02-28
• Original language: English
• Binding: Hardcover
• 256 pages

Review
"'Unlike many psychotherapists, Yalom writes like a dream' The Oxford Times"

About the Author
Dr Yalom is Professor Emeritus of Psychiatry at Stanford University. He has won two major awards from the American Psychiatric Association and is the author of the highly regarded Love's Executioner and Momma and the Meaning of Life. He continues to run his clinical practice and lectures widely.

Customer Reviews

Profound, humane and rewarding
One irritated quibble out of the way: a previous reviewer said that as a Christian he "knows" that death is not the end. I can only assume that this is the sort of parapraxis all too frequently encountered in the religious who actually mean to write "believe" and mistakenly write "know." Some people, for reasons best known to themselves, believe that death is not the end of personal consciousness, which is entirely their right: they do not know as much, however much the religionist likes to conflate these two entirely different and separate concepts.

Anyway. Yalom's latest book is a delight - much as one would expect from so engaging a writer of both fiction and non-fiction. Trying to tackle the human existential terror of annihilation is a tall order for even the most ably qualified of people, but Yalom, as an existential therapist with nearly half a century of experience, is superbly placed. This is not necessarily to say that Yalom could succeed or has succeeded where innumerable philosophers past and present have failed (in reconciling the human existent to the end of life and consciousness): but it is no disservice to so wise and engaging a man or his book to say that it is a beautifully attractive whistle-stop tour of what both ancient thinkers such as Epicurus (something of a hero to Yalom, as well he might be) and contemporary psychotherapy can do to speak to the human condition vis a vis death - finite and mortal creatures, we all have to face up in one way or another, reality-based or not, to the end of our individual lives and those things which we have created within those lives.

Contrary to what the previous reviewer may think, countless people outside his own atypically religious society and culture do indeed face up to the end of life (their own and that of others) without the dubious alleged 'benefits' of death-denying religious stories. Yalom, as an existential psychotherapist, reminds us not just how but more importantly why such an effort is made. One might say that the entire book is in a sense an expansion of the famous remark of Bertrand Russell, paraphrased roughly as saying that looking hard reality square in the face may be chilly at first, but ultimately becomes bracing. I cannot recommend this book highly enough - a lovely, lyrical and at times highly personal meditation from a true humanist.

A book to return to several times
I am still reading this book. I savour each chapter, think and ruminate about both content and philosophy, and sometimes re-read parts of it. It
is one of the most sincere, truthful and yet comforting book I have read. NOT an easy read; it engages us, the reader, and enables us tp 'stare at the sun',

"To become wise you must learn to listen to the wild dogs barking in your cellar"
Yalom's new book about overcoming the terror of death was a surprise to me. Although I have thought about death, I am not afraid of death itself. Even at this age - approaching 50 - my thoughts are mainly consumed with making plans about the future, and definitely not death.

Nevertheless, I read this book with great interest. I was surprised to discover that Yalom refers to the knowledge and tranquillity he found in ancient wisdom, particularly that of ancient Greek philosophers and that of Epicurus especially. I am interested in how the Greek philosophers approached life and its meaning. I have studied - not extensively - Epicurus ideas, but I never, until now, connected them with my perception about life and death. Reading Yalom's book made me realise how much the philosopher's powerful ideas as well as other writers' work - mainly Kazantzakis and Tolstoy - have influenced my thinking on how to face death and how to live.

Despite the extensive references, Yalom should perhaps have explored in more detail Epicurus' ideas. When I finished chapter four, I had the feeling that something important is missing, something may be untold. Moreover, Epicurus powerful message was somehow lost his importance between the many examples from films, literature and clinical case histories.

I particularly liked Yalom's way of thinking about paranormal and religious beliefs. As a person that I never believed in any God I hold with Yalom's line of secular humanism. But, this may be a problem to some readers whose religious and spirituals beliefs are different, and may be add more anxiety and probably confusion to those who are unprepared or spiritually, not strong enough, to accept the idea of emptiness and nothingness after death. That is one more reason of why the philosophers ideas should be presented with a more precise and clear way that would intrigue the reader to go and explore further the philosophers' writings.

I found very satisfying Yalom's approach to Freud's lack of interest or failure to explore death fears. I had always my reservations on Freud's belief that the origins of neurosis rested on the assumption of conflict between various unconscious, primitive and instinctual forces. Death or the fear of death for Freud could play no role in the genesis of neurosis because we have no personal experience of death and it is impossible to contemplate our nonbeing.

Although it is impossible to contemplate our nonbeing we experience death from a very early age as we don't fail to have glimpses of mortality everywhere in nature and our surroundings. The interpretation of Epicurus ideas and Yalom's clinical cases show that humans unconsciously express with a distinguished way their concerns about death. According to Yalom, excessive religiosity, the consuming accumulation of wealth and consumerism, the blind gasping for power and fame are all signs of human's continuous and wasted fight to mortality.

It was a rather uncomfortable surprise to discover that modern psychiatrists and therapists need also help to deal with the fear of death and in some cases are unable to deal with everyday issues and situations. I am not an expert on psychotherapy and I have never being in counselling or on a therapist's coach. I am very reluctant to believe that our dreams have some secret meaning or that they reflect our fears. Maybe that is because I rarely remember any of my dreams or maybe because my logic indicates that if you want to find a meaning or a message, you can find anywhere, anyway. I don't forget that therapists are also humans with their own fears and problems to overcome, but these signs of impotence made me wonder about their effectiveness to make other people feel better. I can't stop thinking that maybe a long lasting treatment or counselling is just another form of dependence that hampers humans' free spirit.

Nevertheless, I liked the book and I believe that it can offer a lot of help to many people to face their fears and the anxiety of death. Most importantly, it reminds us that "life is a passing parade". We will die well when we fulfil our potential, and live a life with meaning, when we "Leave death nothing but a burned out castle."