Product Description

Now in a NEW UPDATED version, Kurcinka offers parents the most up-to-date research, effective strategies and real life stories for: -Managing intensity - not just the kids, but parents too -Getting the sleep every family needs and deserves, -Choosing their battles -Helping children to hear their instructions -Assisting children in getting along with siblings and peers, and -Being successful in school and at home. Spirited children possess traits we value in adults, yet find challenging in children. Studies now show that these children are "wired" to be more reactive to the world around them. The solution, rather than medication or punishment, is understanding temperament and working with it. Kurcinka in a supportive, warm style is able to reveal to parents how to do it, often leading them to ask, "How did she get into my home?" Winner of the Parents' Choice Award, voted one of the top twenty books for parents, and a "real life saver" for parents, this updated version is eagerly awaited by parents and professionals.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #12814 in Books
• Published on: 2006-11-15
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 496 pages

Customer Reviews

so I AM normal!!!
Reading this book was like someone switching the light on! This explains so many things about why my wonderful and energetic child challenges me on every level. From the simple advice of re-labling (from stubborn to persistant, from impatient to excited....) to the amazing and effective advice on why I have been held prisoner between 7pm - 9pm every night for months while my son tries to cling to me incase I leave his bedside. Finally I am reassured that my little boy is normal and spirited - a wonderful word - and he DOES respond. He is not naughty, and I am NOT a bad parent! YAY! If you are wondering how other mothers cope while you are a bag of nervous exhaustion, PLEASE read this book!

Fabulous book
I bought this book for a friend 4 years ago when she was having trouble with her son who was 7. As soon as she read it she recognized that she had a spirited child and the book really helped her to deal with him. I felt so sorry for my friend at the time and yet low and behold my daughter who was only 6 months at that time turned out to be one and the same...a spirited child. She was the only child crying in the baby ward each night and she cried every night for 4 years...even now she is 4 1/2 and she still needs us to put her to bed and hold her hand till she sleeps then she will wake up at numerous times. Many people have told us that we were doing it all wrong but we honestly tried everything, it was a relief to read therefore that it is okay to hold their hand going to bed each night and to comfort them without punishing ourselves for giving in. The tantrums were dreadful and many a time at a shopping mall we would get our spectators as my daughter threw a wobbly, her eyes would glaze over and she would be out of control, getting her back to normal was very difficult. She can still throw a wobbly but she can sense it coming and we have taught her skills to deal with it. If we leave it too late then we know we are in for big trouble. She is a perfectly polite little girl but I always knew she was different and finally when I read this book I recognized my daughter and finally had the tools to help her and to finally enjoy her company. Raising a spirited child is hard work and rewards can be few especially if you do not know what you are dealing with. This book teaches you how to look for the signs that trigger tantrums and to help both the parent and child come to a greater understanding. More parents need to read this book especially if they feel that they have a naughty child.

Cause, Effect and Practical Solutions!
Mary Sheedy Kurcinka does an excellent job of providing good common sense answers to why children are spirited and practical ways of dealing with the behavior. Observation, analysis and then appropriate action are keys to dealing with this behavior.

For example, in one Section called CHECK SIMULATION Levels Kurcinka writes:

"I always tell parents in my classes that if they ever feel like they are the only parent in the world with a sensitive spirited child, they should drop everything and head for the largest, noisiest, most congested store in their area. There they will find spirited kids dropping like little bombs. Two down one isle. Three in aisle four--the candy shelf--and six in aisle seven--the toy department. At first glance it will appear that the explosions are triggered by a denial to buy a candy bar, a desire to push the cart, or some other insignificant issue. The real trigger, however, is hidden in the fluorescent lights, piped-in-music, flashing signs, colorful packages, and crush of people that create more stimulation than a sensitive child can endure, especially if his or her energy bank is low."

She goes on to write:
"As a parent of a spirited child, you have to become aware of stimulation cues and recognize the breaking point for your child. The level of stimulation that pushes her beyond her ability to cope."

Kurcinka also explores subjects such as introverted and extroverted children, how they recharge their batteries and how to handle them. Other subjects include: How to deal with tantrums, Getting along with other kids, Motivating kids to listen and much more.

Overall an exceptional book on looking at cause, effect and practical solutions for addressing spirited children. Highly recommended.

The Re-Discovery of Common Sense: A Guide To: The Lost Art of Critical Thinking